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Divorce is Washington is difficult under the best of circumstances. It is exponentially more difficult when the process is messy and there is a legal battle. Spouses must take the time to focus on their well-being during this period in their life. The alternative is finding that their mental health could be compromised.

Perhaps the most important thing is to find people to share emotions with and use as a support network. There is nothing wrong with talking to friends and seeking their feedback and reassurance. It is helpful to have multiple sounding boards as the divorce process unfolds. However, under no circumstances should the children be put in the middle of the divorce. Things can only get worse if they are forced to choose sides, and it is harmful to the children.

Self-care is also a must for keeping sanity. This means getting out of the home to do things and paying attention to one’s appearance. Sitting at home and letting oneself go can have effects that carry over into multiple areas of life. It can result in getting stuck in a closed feedback loop in which things only get worse. Finally, the absolute worst thing for one’s psyche is to assume blame for the divorce at this early juncture. The focus needs to be on getting through this difficult time as opposed to pointing a finger.

Another means of making the process easier may be to work with a family law lawyer. Leaving most of the details of the divorce to a lawyer is a way to free up time and mental energy in order to focus on staying emotionally healthy. In addition, the lawyer may help lower the level of tension by trying to negotiate an agreement on behalf of their client that might settle the matter finally.